From The Tattooed Stranger (dir. Edward Montagne, 1950). Captain Lundquist (Frank Tweddell) has chosen Detective Frank Tobin (John Miles) to work with Lieutenant Corrigan (Walter Kinsella) on a homicide. Corrigan balks:
”Aw, have a heart, Lundy, I’ve never worked with a college-boy cop before. I might use bad grammar.”
And Lundquist: “Grow up, Corrigan.” And the captain cites Tobin’s military service and accomplishments as a police offer as evidence that the college boy is no mere “bookbender.”
Anyone who teaches English knows that when you admit what you do for a living, you risk hearing someone say “I better watch my grammar.” It’s sad. I’ve used three replies to allay any fear:
“Don’t worry, my grammar ain’t very good.”
“Don’t worry, my grammar aren’t very good.”
“Don’t worry, I taught literature” (or poetry, or stories).
They all seem to work. But I think I like the second best, because it’s so patently ridiculous. All three, I’d say, are better than the plain “Don’t worry, I don’t correct people’s grammar,” which implies that the other person is likely to make mistakes and that English teachers are in the habit of correcting such mistakes. I’ll quote myself, from a review of Anne Curzan’s Says Who? A Kinder, Funner Usage Guide for Everyone Who Cares about Words:
Someone with a keen attention to language is first of all attentive to getting things right in their own speech and writing and to recognizing the standards appropriate to different forms of discourse.Related reading
All OCA grammar posts (Pinboard)
comments: 1
In Mad Magazine, they might run a series of replies:
"If I say I'm a barber, people start fussing with their hair."
"Unless you're a novelist, because speech in real-time is not grammatical."
"Ya, we can't all be perfect like Mr. Data."
"That's what time machines were invented for."
(followed by) "I don' see why people are so offended by time travel changing history. I mean, WW IV could have been much worse."
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