[Ralph Kramden’s bad points and good points, by Ralph Kramden. From the Honeymooners episode “Young Man with a Horn,” March 24, 1956. Click for a much larger view.]
I have the thirty-nine “classic” Honeymooners episodes on DVD, but I am still driven to watch whatever episode airs on Sunday night on MeTV. “Young Man with a Horn” aired this past Sunday. In this episode a visit from doughnut-company owner August Gunther and his wife to the Kramdens’ apartment — the Gunthers’ first apartment, many years ago — prompts Ralph to emulate Mr. Gunther and aim to become a success by eliminating his weaknesses and building up his strong points.
Bad points: 1. Late for work. 2. Oversleeping. 3. Snores. 4. Loses temper. 5. Don’t pay debts. 6. Too fat. 7. Brags. 8. Connives. 9. Daydreams. 10. Avoids responsibility. 11. Stubborn. 12. Too fat. 13. Overeats. 14. Neglects wife. 15. Spends foolishly. 16. Gullible. 17. Sloppy dresser. 18. Treats wife like workhorse. 19. Generally untidy. 20. Too fat. 21. Talks too much. 22. Argues too much.
Good points: 1. Loves wife. 2. Admits mistakes. 3. Soft hearted. 4. Has good intentions. 5. Basically honest when pinned down.
Norton suggested bad point no. 5: “You owed me two dollars for the last month.” And after Ralph pays up: “I knew it’d work!” Norton’s single suggested good point, which sort of makes this list: “The sweetest guy in the world.”
“Young Man with a Horn” is one of the most poignant Honeymooners episodes. It has very little yelling, and is nearly all hope, failure, and hope.
You can watch this episode now at YouTube.
*
An afterthought: It occurred to me that aside from the names of members behind in dues, written on a chalkboard in the Raccoon lodge, Ralph’s list of bad points and good points might be the only handwritten text we ever see in The Honeymooners.
Related reading
All OCA Honeymooners posts (Pinboard)
[Individual items on the list shift in and out of focus as the camera moves away from the wall. I transcribed with care. As far as I can tell, this transcription is the only one to be found online. I am thinking of this post as a fleeting refuge from the horror of current events.]
Tuesday, March 23, 2021
Ralph Kramden’s list
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comments: 4
Interesting: I didn't realize Ralph was so self-aware, or that he loved Alice.
I could never stand him so watched only a few minutes of "The Honeymooners" in my life.
Maybe I'll try just this episode.
He’s devoted to her, and, as he’s always having to admit, she’s right. He, in contrast, is a self-confessed moax (screw-up, loser, jerk). The threats of violence, though always empty, sometimes make the show hard to watch. I think my favorite episode is “A Woman’s Work Is Never Done.” I sometimes showed some of it when teaching Lysistrata.
Yes, it's that famous "to the moon".
I knew of it before I even watched a minute of the show.
Glad to know the threats are understood to be empty.
Hmmm...
I was just reading about Punch & Judy--seems possibly an ancestor?
I could partly agree with Charles Dickens, here, on the role of comic violence (and entirely agree that making theater "moral and instructive" can be a big mistake!):
"In my opinion the street Punch is one of those extravagant reliefs from the realities of life which would lose its hold upon the people if it were made moral and instructive.
I regard it as quite harmless in its influence, and as an outrageous joke which no one in existence would think of regarding as an incentive to any kind of action or as a model for any kind of conduct.
It is possible, I think, that one secret source of pleasure very generally derived from this performance… is the satisfaction the spectator feels in the circumstance that likenesses of men and women can be so knocked about, without any pain or suffering."
Charles Dickens, letter to Mary Tyler, 6 November 1849
Via an article from the V&A Museum:
www.vam.ac.uk/articles/thats-the-way-to-do-it-a-history-of-punch-and-judy
I don’t know much about Punch and Judy, but it sounds like an apt comparison to me. The connection I see to Lysistrata is that the men are always shown up as fallible, laughable. But the patriarchy always is back to usual in the end.
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