Gulden’s app

It came to me in a dream: the Gulden’s app. Press the spicy brown dot, and a runner comes to your door with a blob of Gulden’s Mustard for your sandwich. The app would save its user the inconvenience of using Gulden’s plastic squeeze bottle. Location Services required.

This dream app was no doubt the result of a conversation last night about the feasibility of online grocery shopping. And did I mention the inconvenience of Gulden’s plastic squeeze bottle? The knife has not been made than can extract all that bottle’s mustard. The jar was a friendlier container.

This app idea is free to any interested iOS developer.


[Spicy brown icon. Yes, that’s mustard, beveled with an online icon maker.]

Related reading
Other dream posts (Pinboard)

[And in the near far future, drones!]

How to draw a duck

[Cigarette card, “How to draw a duck without pencil leaving the paper,” c. 1908–1919. From the George Arents Collection, via the New York Public Library Digital Gallery.]

I want to say that it was a simpler time, but I think it was in truth a more complicated time. That’s one elaborate duck.

Also from the NYPL Gallery
A 1914 telephone call : The Automat : Benny Goodman : A cigarette card of mystery : Inspector Bucket : Invisible ink : The NYPL Stereograminator : Whelan’s Drug Store

Overheard

In an outpost of a prominent coffee chain. The customer was a Gregory Corso look-alike and sound-alike:

“Do you have coffee?”

“Yes, we do.”

“I’ll make it simple for you. Gimme a hot coffee.”

Related reading
All “overheard” posts (Pinboard)

[All dialogue guaranteed overheard.]

Reading surveilled

[W]e have awoken to find a retail panopticon where everything we say or see is observed, counted, and recorded. . . . Even readerly underlining, once the bastion of self-referentiality, is now being viewed for marketing purposes with the help of electronic readers. There is no outside the network today except the ever dwindling space-time of off. As Don DeLillo writes in Valparaiso, his satirical drama of contemporary media, “Everything is the interview.” We have returned to a world before the invention of privacy.

Andrew Piper, Book Was There: Reading in Electronic Times (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2012).

And now the act of reading itself is becoming data. Read all about it: As New Services Track Habits, the E-Books Are Reading You (The New York Times).

[Mac Dictation turned panopticon into panoptic con. Hmm. Thanks for the book, Ben.]

Pedestrians in Los Angeles

The New York Times reports on a crackdown on pedestrians in Los Angeles:

When Adam Bialik, a bartender, stepped off the curb on his way to work at the Ritz-Carlton a few blinks after the crossing signal began its red “Don’t Walk” countdown, he was met by a waiting police officer on the other side of the street and issued a ticket for $197.

“I didn’t even know that was against the law,” he said. “I was like, ‘You are the L.A.P.D., and this is what you are doing right now?’”

When Elaine and I were in Los Angeles last fall, we walked great distances and never got a ticket. I’m pretty certain that we never jaywalked — it would have been like trying to cross a football field.

Christmas 1913

[“13,000 at the Spugs Christmas Party: Band Played, Chorus and Soloists Sang, and Nearly Everybody Danced. 40-Foot Tree Bore Gifts. The Children Got Half a Pound of Candy Each; Luncheon Served to All.” The New York Times, December 26, 1913.]

The Society for the Prevention of Useless Giving, the Spugs, was the creation of Mrs. August Belmont. Its mission: “to fight petty holiday grafting.” A 1912 Times article attributed to Mrs. Belmont this definition of Spug̢: “a woman who has vowed never again in all her life to give any Christmas gift that is not offered with a whole heart.” The Times described the Spug as “a working girl who has put her foot on all the usual Christmas-time schemes for raising money with which to buy Christmas presents for those ‘higher up,’” such as floorwalkers and head salesladies.

To all who celebrate it, Merry Christmas. May the presents you give and receive be real ones.

A seasonal joke in the traditional manner

Why was Santa Claus wandering the East Side of Manhattan?

[The answer is in the comments. The traditional manner: à la my dad.]

Santa on break

“A Santa during a coffee break during the NYC Christmas season.” Photograph by Leonard McCombe. New York City, December 1962. From the Life Photo Archive. Click for a larger view.]

[The counter layout and the sugar dispenser suggest that Santa might be a Chock full o’Nuts customer. The tray though doesn’t. Maybe it came from the North Pole with Santa.

Related posts
Chock full o’Nuts
Chock full o’Nuts lunch hour
New York, 1964: Chock full o’Nuts

A VLC replacement icon

[Left: icon by VLC. Right: icon by Primofenax.]

I know that the VLC icon has a story behind it. But I don’t like that traffic cone. I like it even less when it wears a Santa hat — to me, it looks tacky. I do like this alternative icon by Primofenax. And I like VLC, a lot, though 2.1.2 has problems playing DVDs on my Mac. I’ve gone back to 2.1.1.

From the app’s website: “VLC is a free and open source cross-platform multimedia player and framework that plays most multimedia files as well as DVD, Audio CD, VCD, and various streaming protocols.” One great advantage of VLC, for me: unlike OS X’s DVD Player, VLC allows screenshots.

Related posts
Notational Velocity replacement icon
TextWrangler replacement icon

[The free app img2icns turns an image file into an icon. There’s a nice replacement icon for that app too.]

Public radio map

I like exploring the weirdness of “the dial,” all of it, but I still think I would find this page invaluable on a long car trip: a public radio map, by Andrew Filer.

A related post
New directions in advertising (Indiana AM weirdness)

[Did car radios ever have dials?]