“Turning Off the News”

From The Borowitz Report, “Turning Off the News”:

I’m not a neuroscientist like George Santos, but in my experience, turning off the news is good for your mental health. And you’ll have more time for things you actually enjoy. Read a novel. See a friend. Walk your dog. Which is what I’m going to do right now.

I don’t have a dog. But I’m still going to go for a walk. Now.

Andy Borowitz recommends news via BBC Sounds.