Leopold Bloom, proto-blogger

As Leopold Bloom sits on the pot reading “Matcham’s Masterstroke,” a prizewinning story in the magazine Titbits, he thinks about writing something himself. From the “Calypso” episode:

James Joyce, Ulysses (1922).

Leopold Bloom, proto-blogger, collecting choice moments of domestic comedy.

Notice that the imagined byline merges Leopold and his wife Molly into a single self: there’s no indication elsewhere that Mr. Bloom has a middle name beginning with M. Androgyny runs through the novel. In the “Circe” episode of the novel, Mr. Bloom will be revealed as “a finished example of the new womanly man.”

And yes, cuffs were once used as writing surfaces.

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Hill, Sam

As a college student, I worked in the housewares departments of two discount department stores. These days, shoppers still sometimes ask me where things are. On more than one occasion a shopper has told me that they thought I was an employee. I must have the right look.

Today, as I strode a main aisle in our friendly neighborhood multinational retailer, an older fellow asked me, “Do you know where in the Sam Hill the mouthwash is?”

I didn’t hesitate: “Same aisle as the toothpaste, two aisles down.”

As for Sam Hill, he’s in Green’s Dictionary of Slang.

“Seesoo, hrss, rsseeiss, ooos”

From the “Proteus” episode:

James Joyce, Ulysses (1922).

“Better get this job over quick”: it takes a bit of inference to understand that Stephen Dedalus is urinating. He wonders whether it’s safe to set down his walking stick, decides that it is, and the scene dissolves into a play of sound as his urine mixes with the water of Cock Lake. For contrast: when Leopold Bloom goes out to the jakes in “Calypso,” it’s entirely clear what’s happening: “Hope it’s not too big bring on piles again. No, just right. So. Ah!”

Cock Lake, believe it or not, is real, “a tidal pool off Sandymount” (Don Gifford, Ulysses Annotated ).

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The best pens?

The New York Times Wirecutter offers recommendations for the best ballpoint, rollerball, and gel pens.

I like the Parker Jotter, the Papermate InkJoy, and the Uni-ball Signo RT. The last two go unmentioned in the Times. But I’d rather be using a fountain pen, Pelikan or Kaweco, with Aurora black ink.

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Only Murders slight, slight spoiler

[Caution.]

“Is that Shirley MacLaine?” And two seconds later: “That’s Shirley MacLaine!” What a treat to see her in Only Murders in the Building last night (season two, episode two). A one-off guest spot? That’s my guess.

How to improve writing (no. 103)

From a New York Times obituary for Margaret Keane, painter of big-eyed children:

Such rebukes had no effect on the popularity of Keane art. In 1964, Keane prints alone grossed $2 million. In 1965, a Life magazine article, “The Man Who Paints Those Big Eyes,” likened it to Howard Johnson’s ubiquitous restaurants.

I noticed the problem while eating a bowl of Shredded Wheat: what’s it ? If the referent is art, it’s too far back. Better:

Such rebukes had no effect on the popularity of Keane art. In 1964, Keane prints alone grossed $2 million. In 1965, a Life magazine article, “The Man Who Paints Those Big Eyes,” likened Keane art to Howard Johnson’s ubiquitous restaurants.

But now the repeating Keane is too much. How about:

Such rebukes had no effect on popular taste. In 1964, Keane prints alone grossed $2 million. In 1965, a Life magazine article, “The Man Who Paints Those Big Eyes,” likened Keane art to Howard Johnson’s ubiquitous restaurants.

As the Times obituary makes clear, it was Margaret Keane, not her credit-taking husband Walter, who did the painting.

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[This post is no. 103 in a series dedicated to improving stray bits of public prose.]

“Real, real bad”

“Things might get real, real bad on January sixth”: White House chief of statt Mark Meadows to his assistant Cassidy Hutchinson, January 2, 2021.

And when Rudy Giuliani was around, Hutchinson heard references to the Oath Keepers and the Proud Boys.

And when Meadows was told about the presence of weapons on January 6, he did not even look up from his phone. And then he did, and said that he had told Donald Trump.

In other words, they knew. Of course they did.

*

And Trump: “Take the fucking mags away.” He wanted magnetometers removed so that those with weapons could enter the space for his rally. Those people weren’t there to hurt him, he said. So when he talked about walking down Pennsylvania Avenue, he was sending armed supporters to the Capitol.

And Trump did intend to walk (or ride) to the Capitol. And enter the House chamber. And he grabbed for the steering wheel of the presidential SUV when told that he was going back to the White House: ”I’m the fucking president. Take me up to the Capitol now.” He also lunged at a Secret Service agent in the vehicle. [The grab and lunge are disputed. Hutchinson was testifying to what she was told.]

Back at the White House, Trump lost his lunch. In other words, he threw it against a wall. Ketchup everywhere. Hutchinson says that Trump had thrown dishes or flipped a tablecloth on other occasions as well.

*

Hutchinson knew enough to caution Meadows not to go to the Willard Hotel on January 5, where Michael Flynn and Roger Stone was scheming. Meadows called in instead.

*

As rioters were nearing the Capitol, Hutchinson asked Meadows if he had told Trump. No, Meadows said. The president wants to be alone.

“He doesn’t want to do anything, Pat”: Meadows to Trump lawyer Pat Cipollone.

”You heard it, Pat. He thinks Mike deserves it. He doesn’t think they’re doing anything wrong”: Meadows to Cipollone, about the chant to hang Mike Pence.

*

Trump wanted a January 7 post-insurrection statement to cast blame on Pence and suggest pardons for rioters. Meadows suggested language about pardons as well.

Pardon requests came from Giuliani and Meadows.

*

Liz Cheney is closing with accounts from unidentified witnesses of the pressure put on them before they testified to the January 6 committee. “He knows you’re loyal,” and so on. Under his eye, right? That’s witness tampering.

“I paid my way ”

Mr. Deasy, schoolmaster, has paid Stephen Dedalus, teacher, his monthly wage, £3 12s. The coins make “a lump” in Stephen’s pocket. When the conversation turns to the importance of saving money, Mr. Deasy invokes Shakespeare: “Put but money in thy purse” he says. Uhm, that’s Iago, as Stephen points out. But Mr. Deasy is undaunted. He asserts that Shakespeare himself “knew what money was”; he was a poet, yes, “but an Englishman too.” And then Mr. Deasy reveals “the proudest word you will ever hear from an Englishman’s mouth.” Wait for it. From the “Proteus” episode:

James Joyce, Ulysses (1922).

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[In his Ulysses Annotated, Don Gifford points out that in Dublin 1904 Stephen could live comfortably on his modest salary. On June 16 he spends more than half his month’s wages in a pub crawl.]

Foley

Tricks of the Foley artist. From The New Yorker:

Vegetables are old standbys: snapped celery for broken bones, hammered cabbage for a punch. (According to the Web site Atlas Obscura, during the climax of Titanic, in which Kate Winslet floats, shivering, on a piece of debris, Foley artists peeled back layers of frozen lettuce to add texture to the sound of her crisping hair.) Paper clips or nails, taped to the tips of a glove, are useful for the clicking footsteps of a house pet. Wet pieces of chamois leather, the sort that is used for cleaning cars, are highly versatile.

Rodney Davis vs. Mary Miller

The New York Times has an article about their primary contest. One detail I didn’t know about: “At the rally here [Mendon, Illinois] on Saturday night with Mr. Trump, Ms. Miller’s campaign played videos of Mr. Davis wearing a mask at the height of the pandemic.” Shame on him, right?

In December 2020, Miller called the presidential election “the greatest heist of the 20st century.” On January 5, 2021, she cited Adolf Hitler as being “right on one thing.” In July 2021, she declared that she was not wearing a mask again. But really, her mask has been off for a long time.

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